![]() ![]() Not a pop shot to be seen, and none of the sex is all that hot, but it's a fun way to waste 45 minutes. And the music in this one is rad as can be. Johnny watching the action on his movie set is plain goofy. From this partner to that one, taking a hit of some weed and cutting a rug. People just dancing, porking, and dancing. The party/orgy scene was simply plain fun to watch. But it's not the female that's turning him on, and walks off the set with the male acting in the scene, They leave holding each other's naked asses. He yells “CUT!†after he can contain his trouser snake no longer. Apparently it was TOO hot because John strips while watching the action, and for a little comic relief, he mugs for the camera. “…Let's see if we can get this in one take…make it look good, make it look hot…†he tells the actors. John gets to work on his next movie's set, with Jim Henson as the set photographer. It's a fly-on-the-wall eyeful of a swinger's party, and it's real swank. Bodies start bumpin' and fluids start a-swappin'. The crowd is totally getting down with the tunes. Pot smoke wafts around the room, funky-ass music is playing, lights are flashing, and everyone is dancing and removing clothing. What he's really talking about is probably unimportant, but what is important is that at the 19:10 mark a party takes place that lasts for thirteen minutes, nine of which are one take, which is a single wide shot of the room and its occupants getting down and grooving. He produces movies, ever since he caught the bug when watching an orgy movie at a friend's house. Other than that, not a whole lot going for this one. But there are a brief few shots of Hollywood (very brief) that may hold some interest. It's really pretty shitty, without any overly horrible dialogue. Not much to this one but a bunch of straight up fucking, and with just one money shot at the end. Well, not really, but no other instruments other than his jumbo dog ever go near their privates. Once he starts, these ladies get the royal treatment and he plows the fetus right out of them. The totally nude patients lay down on a table in a room sterilized by cigarettes and Johnny gives them the probe. He wastes no time in giving these poor young ladies who made bad decisions the help they need. Guess who the doctor/abortionist is? Yes, that's right, the man of the hour himself, John Holmes with his third arm. The friend suggests Miss Knocked-Up pay the clinic a visit, which she does. ![]() How a friend's occupation never comes up in a conversation is a real mystery, but apparently these two ladies don't talk about anything of substance, until now. Her good friend tells her something she's never told her before: for years she's worked for an abortionist. One girl reveals to a friend that she done gone and got herself pregnant and doesn't know what to do. But they don't try much harder than that to get their “message†across. This can be surmised by the brief narration at the beginning that talks about girls going to illegal abortionists. Some ladies have promiscuous sex and get themselves into trouble in what seems to be an attempt at making an “educational†film about the risks of unprotected, random sex. John Holmes really shows his acting range in four entirely (not really) different films with clever (not at all) stories. Cast: John Holmes and a cast of unrecognizable peopleīuilding on their “Grindhouse Collection†label, After Hours Cinema crams four movies featuring the rubbery-penised porno icon on two discs. ![]()
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